Krishna Dharajiya When you deny, disown or suppress something of yourself, it do not disappear…!!! It just fades away from your conscious to subconscious…!!! The process of “consciously confronting” these suppressed parts of your subconscious is called Shadow-Work.
What is Shadow?
Sometimes we feel, we are out of our own control..!! We should be able to control ourselves better as we are adults with conscious mind. But we keep falling into same pit and repeating same patterns again and again…!!! This is the result of our “shadow”…!!!
Shadow refers the parts of ourselves that we reject, suppress, disown or deny…!!! (It contains both positive as well as negative suppressed traits)
Positive aspects of your character like talent, creativity AND negative aspects like primitive instincts, sexual desires and traumatic experiences (especially childhood traumas) stay hidden in your shadow.
Carl Jung on Shadow
Carl Jung is one of the famous psychologist of previous century. He bridged psychology and spirituality. He traveled to India often, practiced different spiritual practices and studied ancient vedic scriptures on human existence. His work was constantly revolving around comprehensive analysis of ego, subconscious and conscious. Especially the Shadow has been on the twigging top.
Jung said,
“ The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge”
How is Shadow Developed?
We are born “Whole” as child, but that “Wholeness” is short-lived as we are “relationally dependent” on our family for survival in childhood…!!
So now the family that you are born into, teaches you to accept and reject some aspects of yours on basis of the society that your family socialize into..!!(however such societies themselves are devolved yet). For example, “you should not talk like this, you should not walk like this — what will people say??? ” (These acts are highly done to “please the society” in most of the cases)
So being a child, in “Name of Survival”, we do anything we can, to disown/deny/suppress those aspects in ourselves that are “disapproved of”, while exaggerating that are “approved of” (by our family)…!!!! This create split in us what we called conscious and subconscious. This self preservation instinct of dividing ourselves in conscious and subconscious is our first act of self rejection….!!!
(Human shadow often contains rejected aspects of person that are truly positive..!! This is especially true for person who suffers from shame and low self-esteem…!!!)
What is Shadow Work?
Shadow work is process of making unconscious conscious and unacceptable acceptable. It includes any practice that makes you aware of your unconscious and bring you into integration with it. By exploring hidden aspects of your shadow and “acknowledging them”, you actually start a journey towards inner wisdom, authentic life and self-realization…!!!
Shadow work is all about “consciously facing and releasing” your suppressed/rejected inner part that has become subconscious or unconscious.
How Shadow Grows?
Shadow is the “integral part” of your existence, that you are willfully blind to..!!! It is your dark side that is concealed and camouflaged to protect the image that fits the narratives of your social conditioning to keep/feel yourself safe…!!!
It creates a fantastic world of your own which do not synchronize with the frequency of the real world…!!! As a result, your perception gets prone to certain biases and prejudices that cloud your reasoning and judgement power…!!
When you “live” in state of ignorance, shadow grows bigger…!!
Example of Positive and Negative Shadow
Positive Shadow
Suppose a girl is born with sure sense of self confidence and she knows herself well. But she has been taught that girls should not assert their opinions and should say quiet before others. So now her family will start rejecting the confidence in her that she is born with.
So for the sake of survival in social group, she will also start suppressing the confidence in herself. In order to get love to the degree that as an adult she will be most sweet, quiet, soft and obedient…!!! BUT Now, her life would be painful, as she has divided and exiled a part of herself which she was born with…!!
Later on, when she meets a person having confidence that she suppressed in her, she once again gets back to her own self. This is positive shadow.
Negative Shadow
Imagine someone having anger instincts and is born in family where anger is considered to be bad. So he is shamed by family for being angry. He will try to dissociate himself from that anger in every way he can. But the anger doesn’t go away…!! He just consciously denies it. As a result, it becomes his subconscious.
Now, when he will be an adult, he will not at all be aware that he has developed “angry looks” in him. Also he cannot see this aspect clearly as he himself has denied it. The people around him will judge him as being tempered but he will excuse “ I am not angry. Its just the way I talk” He will probably relate himself to be easy going….!!!
But when he works with someone to discover the feelings or blues that are part of his memory of subconscious, he may realize that he is actually angry, which is coming out in passive aggressive ways on people around him. This is negative shadow.
How to Do Shadow Work?
Empty Your Shadow
When you try to be someone that you are not, to please others, you actually deny your real self (that you are born with) and your shadow starts growing bigger…. First of all just stop doing that..!!!
See, nobody is perfect. Because no one can take each others place. Every individual have their own sets of “perfection”. Your place is taken by you already. None other can take that place. So be Yourself. The Authentic Self. Don’t try to fit into other’s clothes…!!! Have Guts to be Yourself…!!! Embrace your Core Values…!! If our faces are not similar then how our nature could be the same as that of others?? You have to be uniquely you….!!!
Your traits can either stay in shadow or in your conscious. If you accept/acknowledge them, they remain in conscious but if you ignore/run away from them, they shifts to your shadow (and don’t disappear but hide itself in your subconscious)..!!! So start accepting your traits consciously (If they are good-embrace them… if they are bad and unwanted-improve them..!)… This is how you can “empty your shadow”…!!! And when there is nothing left to be saved in shadow, You become an “Authenticate Human Being”..!!!
Face your fears and insecurities consciously, acknowledge them and try to release all that does not suit to what your instinct says…!!! Come out of unwanted social conditioning towards better self…!!! Be honest to yourself first..!!!
Change Your Frequency
Universe works on frequencies and vibrations. If you carry frequency of pain in your shadow, you will automatically be facing the people or situations that gives you pain…!!! Every emotion possess frequency. If you keep that suppressed/rejected part hidden in your subconscious, you will attract people or situations constantly that triggers your shadow and that emotion (hidden in your shadow)…!!!
Its like a radio station. You can listen to only those channels, whom you set your radio’s frequency to..!!! Change your frequency by doing shadow work and see what miracles you can invite in your life deliberately..!!! If you are vibrating in frequency of love, you attract love..!!!
Do not let your negative shadow drive your life. Your shadow is like seeing the world with yellow glasses. Once you remove the yellow glasses away from your eyes, the world seems clear and perfect…!!! In the same way, when you remove the shadow self and return back to your authenticity, the life becomes crystal clear and much more enjoyable…!!!! Ultimately shadow work brings the attention and love to those aspects of yourself that previously have been rejected.
Remember, the people who have been successful in their life are those who never tried to imitate others…!!! They created their own unique personality and path.
You never know, what you are from core can actually be the qualities necessary for fulfillment of your life’s purpose..!!! So be “true to your self”..!!
Reason Why People Resist from Doing Shadow Work
Every human who socializes goes through the process of splitting themselves into conscious and subconscious. This “self rejection” gives birth to “self hate”…!!! The emptiness that we feel is the remainder of those aspects that we have denied and suppressed…!! And to acknowledge them, you must have to come face to face with pain of having fractured yourself…!! Loose the aspect of yourself for sake of “being loved”…!!! (Everything in this world is either about LOVE or FEAR)
The original pain of rejection will come up every time you do the shadow work…!!! In another words it will bring the same feeling of rejection that you felt first time from your parents and caregivers…!!!
And you feel like you are exiled or punished again…!!! It surpass your survival mechanisms and makes you feel like you are literally going to die…!! No wonder self-realization is not easy to attain…!!! But its not impossible too..!!
Universe Always Helps in Confronting Your Shadow
Shadow work could be painful is true. Self awareness does not come naturally to those who practice of avoiding their pain. Because to become aware of those aspects you must stop trying to escape the pain and emptiness within you.
But the universe is in your side and is eager to make you whole again. Every element in universe is headed towards growth and expansion. So the self that has been fractured seeks to be unified…!! You will be provided with every single opportunity to confront everything you rejected, suppressed and denied that formed your shadow.
So it doesn’t really matters how far you run or how well you think you might hide, your shadow will keep chasing you until you are willing to do the due work that you are left to be done with it…!!
Shadow Work as a Path to Self-Realization
Our shadow may be consisting of suppressed parts from our past lives too..!! Our authentic self is pure but its outer expression does not always appear to be spiritual. We can be taken in by the illusionary natures of the desires and think that the satiation of the worldly desires is all what the soul wants…!!!
We must understand the struggle between the real and the false. The false desires are those we search for in the outside world. The true desires are satisfied from within. The basic struggle of the soul is to differentiate between the two and its inability to differentiate is the reason why it takes birth again and again….!!
But it is important to understand that the fulfillment of the worldly desires is part of the process of unveiling of the true soul. These desires never become fulfilled…!!! The true desire of the soul is to get off the wheel of birth-death and find self-realization, peace and eternal happiness…!!! Shadow work teach us to look for our higher self, which ultimately leads us on path of self-realization…!!
Its Time You Confront Your Shadow and Own Yourself Back..!!!
-*-
Love & Light
Krishna
(Shadow Work is not merely about renunciation and shifting to Himalayas..!! Doing Shadow work also has tremendous benefits in routine worldly life too… Read about those benefits here.)
No One has Reached Enlightenment without Confronting their Shadows. It is Good for Humanity to Master this Tool. A Tool That Will Set Them Free..!!!
